My brother David sent me these, and I though they were worth sharing:
Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter
Got to admire those zombie firearm skills
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
Ya think?
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that’s taking things a bit far!
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy!
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
No-good lazy so-and-sos!
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works better than a fair trial!
War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect!
If Strike Isn’t Settled Quickly, It May Last A While
Anything’s possible!
Cold Wave Linked to Low Temperatures
Who would have thought!
Enfield Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
They may be on to something!
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there’s something stronger than duct tape?
Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
Electrifying!
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Why? Weren’t the first lot fat enough?
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
They told him not to take the baked beans!
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
I bet they taste like chicken.
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
That’s one way to get rid of them!
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall!
And the winner is….
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
That was in Ireland, right?
My favourite: “Cold Wave Linked to Low Temperatures Who would have thought!”